Saturday, February 05, 2005

Mama Said There'd Be Days Like This

I'm a distressed blogger tonight.

There are a lot of us out here. You know who you are. You're students, stay-at-home parents and office workers. You know how to use a computer -- many of you are certified computer gurus, twiddling with your blog templates, writing your own code, tracking the IP addresses of your readers. Some of you know just enough to get Blogger working, don't care about anything but typing your thoughts.

And a lot of those thoughts are unhappy. Marital problems are huge these days. There are husbands frankly admitting that they want to find some nookie on the side, wives who are at the ends of their ropes with unresponsive, uncommunicative husbands; students who are so bored with classes that they are blogging during lectures; receptionists, secretaries, IT personnel and various levels of administrator who are so disgusted by their jobs/paychecks that it seems all they do at the office is blog about how they'd rather not be at the office.

I am your brother tonight. My life hasn't changed, but something is different. This has nothing to do with the Superbowl and the imminent end of the football season. The Vikings got drunk after Thanksgiving dinner as usual, and they're just sobering up now, so I haven't been following football since then.

I have a sense of foreboding this evening, as if something bad is happening, but I am not in on it. Yet. I have dark confessions burning within me that must not escape. I am contemptible. I am wallowing in undefined self-pity. It's unworthy of me. My mind knows this, and is repulsed, but my heart doesn't care. It is heavy with longing and broken hope.

I have never shown my face but I can't hide from myself. I have gone too far, or have I moved at all? No one knows me, or have I revealed too much? I have nothing to say, but an urgent need to talk. I am your distressed blogger.

I'll be fine by the time the sun comes up.

11 Comments:

Blogger Theresa said...

You're like everyone else. You're having a crappy few hours (maybe even a day), but you've got the wisdom to know that you'll get over it.

Well Done!

Sorry for the self-loathing and hopelessness. I know those particular aches and pains too well.

Sun Feb 06, 02:07:00 AM 2005  
Blogger MoonEyedGirl said...

I know the feeling of having nothing to say, but feeling the need to talk.

Sun Feb 06, 07:27:00 AM 2005  
Blogger Kalleigh Hathaway said...

Been there. The itchy sensation of the overly aware. Hope your morning dawns sunnier.

Sun Feb 06, 07:31:00 AM 2005  
Blogger Ron Southern said...

comments not updating?

Sun Feb 06, 12:54:00 PM 2005  
Blogger Ron Southern said...

guess that's not it.

Sun Feb 06, 12:55:00 PM 2005  
Blogger Larry Jones said...

Still alive. Crazy how you make me feel better.

Fucking Vikings anyway.

Sun Feb 06, 01:15:00 PM 2005  
Blogger Ron Southern said...

I keep putting my comments on the wrong posts. Maybe I'm even on the wrong blog. You are Ethel Lugumbo, the woman with the big red lips, aren't you? Oh? Sorry. I'll try to stay in one place next time around.

I was just "playing", but now it looks like I was playing with my own brain.

Sun Feb 06, 02:53:00 PM 2005  
Blogger Theresa said...

Larry, The more I know, the more I like.

Sun Feb 06, 11:59:00 PM 2005  
Blogger Theresa said...

Gotcha KP-Pig! However, the medical professionals in my life are certain that my condition is chronic.

Perhaps it's a "Birds of a Feather" sort of thing?

Mon Feb 07, 02:23:00 PM 2005  
Blogger L said...

that sense of foreboding was probably a sign that you had forgotten that "Love Your Robot Day" was going to be today :O

are you still distressed? I could try telling you knock-knock jokes, which would only make you feel worse...

Mon Feb 07, 09:50:00 PM 2005  
Blogger Larry Jones said...

Period of distress seems to be past. Now entering period of confusion. Might not be able to participate in interactive "knock-knock"-type jokes.

Mon Feb 07, 11:29:00 PM 2005  

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