Kick Me Hard In The Ass If I...
- Rev my engine at stop lights.
- Wear leather pants.
- Talk down to a child.
- Let you sweat out your own computer problems when I know how to fix them easily.
- Don't listen.
- Use advertising slogans instead of real language.
- Won't admit when I'm wrong.
- Feel sorry for myself when others have it so much tougher.
- Attempt to comb over my bald spot.
- Receive your signals and still don't get the message.
- Try to play lead guitar on "Bhodisatva" while drunk.
- Ever again say anything to hurt you.
posted by Larry Jones at 11:40 PM
7 Comments:
Hi! I'm not sure whether this post was directed at a specific individual or everyone generally, but I'd be happy to oblige and help a brother out if the time comes : )
Thanks, Jayne. This is only a partial list of dumbass behaviors I want to avoid. No doubt there are many others to which I have been blind, and of which I will now be reminded.
(Are these word verification challenges getting more complicated? This one was clsyapkd. Hard to read, too.)
You missed "if I put mesmerizing rings behind my head." :P What's with the Rod Serling treatment, mysterioso?
Are you really worried about doing these things, or are they the things that bug the crap out of you that other people do? Based on what I know of you, I can't imagine I'd ever be tempted to aim my boot at your sweet ass.
Steph - The rings are meant to mesmerize you. I'm not mysterious.
Theresa - These things don't always bug the crap out of me when others do them. Some people wear leather pants better than others.
Nice of you to say.
sighed, Another Mr. Nice Guy in Dark Apparel.
Damn, can FedEx deliver an ass kicking? Do you have to get insurance on that? Hummm. Some how, I think you are always going to keep it real.
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